|Plastic White Female|
|Season 1, Episode 12|
|Air date||May 11, 1997|
|Written by||David Zuckerman|
|Directed by||Jeff Myers|
King of the Ant Hill
How to Fire a Rifle Without Really Trying
Joseph invites Bobby to his upcoming boy-girl party. But Bobby soon realizes he is intimidated by most of the girls at school and lacks the courage and social skills needed to approach them. He tells his father he is not going to attend the party because he doesn't like girls. Hank's face begins to twitch at the implication. Later, Luanne brings home a beautician school practice head that she will need for her final exam. Bobby is instantly drawn to the head, and stares at it with rapt wonder. Late that night, he sneaks out of the house and up to Luanne's window, where he again stares with enchantment at the beautiful plastic head.
When Hank, Peggy and Luanne leave the house the next day, Bobby retrieves the head. Practicing in secret, he uses the dummy head in lieu of a real girl, asking it if it would like to dance, etc. Meanwhile, Hank does his best to avoid Luanne, who would like to practice for her upcoming exam by cutting his hair. Bobby practices with the dummy head for so long that he grows comfortable with the idea of attending the party. Hank and Peggy conclude their boy is perfectly normal after all. But when Peggy catches Bobby playing Spin the Bottle with the head, she shrieks in horror.
White as a ghost, Peggy tells Hank she walked in on their son as he was kissing the dummy head. She suggests the family move to Berlin, as the Germans are more tolerant towards freakish people. Bobby tells his father he has no intention of marrying a plastic head. Convinced his boy is using the head as a crutch, Hank locks it in his liquor cabinet. When Hank catches Bobby breaking into the cabinet, he snatches the head from his son's hands, and as Luanne watches, horrified, saws it in two with a spinning sawtoothed blade. Left with little choice, Luanne uses Hank (in place of the plastic head) for her final exam at the beautician academy. Her instructor, Miss Kremzer, examines Hank's haircut and assigns her an "F." But after overhearing Hank's glowing comments about his haircut, calling it his "all-time favorite", Kremzer gives Luanne a passing grade. Later, before the party, Bobby and Connie decide to practice kissing one another. When Bobby plays Spin the Bottle at Joseph's party, the bottle points to Dale's wife, Nancy. Bobby grits his teeth and lunges for Nancy.
- When Peggy and Luanne are entering the kitchen, the soda can changes designs into an Alamo Beer style can saying "Grape" instead of "Alamo".
- This is the first episode of the series to use a quote from the episode as a stinger on the Deedle-Dee Productions logo.
- Stinger Quote: Bobby: "Yo Sherice, you stone-cold fox, what up?"
- When Luanne enters the kitchen with the plastic head, she is wearing a pink half shirt with blue jeans. But when Bobby stares at the plastic head Luanne is seen in her usual clothing (A green half shirt and red shorts)
- This is the last episode Peggy wore whitesocks with her shoes and in later episodes they doesn't wear them anymore.