|Not in My Back Hoe|
|Season 4, Episode 8|
|Air date||November 28, 1999|
|Written by||Paul Lieberstein|
|Directed by||Shaun Cashman|
Happy Hank's Giving
To Kill a Ladybird
The guys rent a backhoe/loader to put in a septic tank at Bill's house. After Dale almost hits Hank and Bill and damages the siding of Bills house with the machine, Hank grows tired of their antics. At the Mega Lo Mart, Hank meets a guy named Hal (Voiced by Drew Carey) who is very similar to himself, even driving the exact same truck. Hank is delighted after he met him, even telling Peggy that he "met a guy". Hank runs into Hal again at a gas station, and they decide to go to The Sports Bar together where they enjoy a beer.
When Hank gets home, he arrives to see Bill trying to open a beer can with the back hoe, damaging the road in the process. Hank then suggests having Hal them join them in the alley, which they are reluctant to agree to. Hal joins them in the alley, but Bill and Dale are not fond of him. Hal and Hank go to look at a track hoe machine, and a jelous Bill and Dale get drunk in the alley until Hank gets home later in the night. They express their displeasure in Hank spending time with Hal and Hank admonishes them.
The next day Hal picks up Hank to go to a sporting goods store in McMaynerberry. Dale and Bill follow them in the Bugabago, with a blanket covering the bug on top of the van. Hank and Hal then go to Earl's Guitars, where they practice playing Hank's favorite song "The Gambler" together.
Dale and Bill get distracted and do not see Hank and Hal leave. When they arrive home, they see Hank and Hal working on the septic tank with the back hoe, infuriating Dale and Bill who feel that Hal crossed the line. Dale then talks Bill into stealing the back hoe, so they cannot work on the septic tank project. They go to a local pet cemetery, where they improperly dig a hole and partially bury themselves.
The next morning, Bill and Dale are noticeably absent from the alley. Hank and Hal meet at a local park, where they realize that their friendship isn't going to work with their schedules, and they see each other for the last time, with Hank remarking "I'm gonna miss that crazy bastard." The back hoe rental company shows up to retrieve the machine, surprising Hank who assumed it was already returned. Kahn tells Hank he saw Dale and Bill leave yesterday, Hank talks to some construction workers who point him in the right direction after he shows them a picture of the back hoe. Hank sees damage to a road and tracks to the pet cemetery, where leads them to Bill and Dale are still trapped in the back hoe. Hank gives them step-by-step directions to dig themselves out, and they free themselves. They ask about Hal, then realize by Hank's reaction that they Hal isn't his friend anymore.
- Hank Hill
- Peggy Hill
- Bobby Hill
- Luanne Platter
- Dale Gribble
- Jeff Boomhauer
- Bill Dauterive
- Hal (cameo)
- Unnamed Man (cameo) - Voiced by Chelcie Ross
- Jimsey (cameo)
- The song that Hank and Hal play on guitars together is "The Gambler" by Kenny Rogers.
- When Hank picks up Hal to go to the sports shop, Hal mentions that the shop "spins around" and that it "used to be a restaurant." This is a reference to the 60th episode when Hank and Peggy ate dinner at the rotating restaurant in McMaynerberry.
- This episode's title is a reference to the phrase "not in my backyard".