|Maid in Arlen|
|Season 7, Episode 22|
|Air date||May 18, 2003|
|Written by||Dan Sterling|
|Directed by||Kyounghee Lim & Boohwan Lim|
Night and Deity
The Witches of East Arlen
Kahn's mother, Laoma, comes to stay with the family. She and Minh do not get along too well because she does not think Minh cleans or cooks well enough. She gets bored at home and walks over to the Hill's where she sees Peggy cleaning her kitchen glass door. Laoma comments that she used to be a maid in Laos and enjoyed it. She soon becomes a maid for the Hill family, as Peggy explains to Hank, "the towel cost more than her!". Laoma cleans the house, spoils Peggy and Bobby, while Hank is uncomfortable with the situation altogether. Laoma spoils Bobby with snacks during the day and explaining to him that he is the "male child of the home" and his job is great and important. Kahn sees his mother cleaning the Hill's trash can and is upset that she is working for the neighbor. At the thought of a day off for Laoma, which means she will be in the house with Minh, Minh runs off to the men in the alley to find days and slots for Laoma to work in other homes. Dale agrees to have Asian fingerprints in his home, and Bill claims he has no attachments to the rats or cockroaches in his home.
Laoma and Bill slowly develop a relationship, much to Kahn's horror. Bill reveals to the men a hickey he received from Laoma. Kahn decides it is time for him to step in and break them up. He visits Bill and informs him that his mother is actually seeing an astronaut, and only dating Bill so he wont be hurt. Bill breaks up with Laoma, she runs out of his house crying. Depressed and sad Laoma decides to move into a nursing home, when Bill (having spoken to Hank to pursue the relationship with Laoma if he truly loves and misses her) rushes out to confess his love. Kahn is exposed as the culprit behind the ruse. However he agrees to deal with the relationship.
"Maid In Arlen" is most likely a spin on the title "Maid In Manhattan."
- Laoma: "Mrs. Hill, I must respectfully say that you are missing an opportunity for the greatest cleanliness of your windows.
- Peggy: "I beg your pardon!"
- Laoma: "You use improper wiping motion."
- Laoma: "If you would allow me to demonstrate."
- Laoma's Go to Line: "If I may just demonstrate."
- Laoma's Funny Line: "Uh oh, Sticky Stain!" "Unh Unh Unh Unh!" (Hank gets up to leave.) "No no Mr. Hill! You stay and watch, I insist!" Laoma grunting to remove the stick stain: "Unh Unh!"
- Hank: "Oh God!"
- Dale: "Heck, I'll take a day, I can use some Asian fingerprints in there."
- Laoma Before Kissing Bill: "I will be gentle, if you will allow me to demonstrate."
- Kahn's Funny Lines Scene in the Alley: "Dautrieve, my mother get home 2 hours late last night! You work her overtime?" (Guys suppress laugh). (Bill: "I'm sorry Kahn, We lost track of the hour.) "Well that unacceptable, every time my mother comes from your house, she's sweaty and exhausted!" (Guys suppress their laugh). (Hank whispers: "Come on guys, coot it!") "From now on, you stop riding my mother so hard!" (The guys laugh really hard!)
- Funny Scene: (Hank is in the bathroom), Laoma, outside the bathroom door, asks: "Do you require assistance Mr. Hill?", Hank: "NO!"
- Laoma: "Bill is such a big strong man!"
- Laoma: (Laoma to Bill) "You know I only flirt with you!" (Kahn: "Unhhh!")
- Kahn: "What a rush! Maybe next, I will break up Hank and Peggy!"
- Dale signs his real name on Minh's clipboard despite it being established that he always signs as "Rusty Shackleford".