|Season 4, Episode 5|
|Air date||November 7, 1999|
|Written by||Garland Testa|
|Directed by||Allan Jacobsen|
Little Horrors of Shop
A Beer Can Named Desire
Aisle 8A is the 65th episode of King of the Hill. It was first aired on November 7, 1999. The episode was written by Garland Testa, and directed by Allan Jacobsen. This is one of the few Connie-centric epsiodes.
Synopsis EditKahn and Minh go to Hawaii for a speech Kahn's has to make for his job and ask Hank to take care of Connie, who's excited that she'll be staying with Bobby, but becomes emotional and mean when she gets her first period. Hank is tasked with dealing with the situation with Connie.
The episode starts with the guys in they alley and Dale bragging about his new supposedly indestructible trash can. Kahn then joins the guys in the alley and starts talking about his big (albeit 5 minutes) speech at his upcoming week long business trip/vacation to Hawaii with his wife Mihn. Mihn is shown on the phone and being informed that Connie's babysitter violated parole and is unable to watch their daughter, Connie much to Kahn's dismay. Mihn reluctantly suggests having one of the neighbors babysit Connie. When they were trying to decide which neighbor to ask, Mihn states "but which evil is lesser?"
They eventually decide on having Hank and Peggy watch her. Bobby is nervous but excited about his girlfriend staying the week at his house, even asking Boomhauer on advice on what to wear. Bobby is seen having trouble looking for age appropriate pajamas, but eventually decides on Ninja Turtles themed pajamas. After Kahn and Mihn leave for Hawaii, everything seems fine in the Hill house with Connie being seemingly like the perfect guest. Connie is seen telling funny stories at the dinner table that even entertain Hank and clearing the table for Peggy.
The next day at the dinner table Connie is shown to be upset and angry about something, and she randomly states at the table "Ugh, how many cows do you people eat in a year?" before asking to be excused from the table. Before she and Bobby go to sleep, he brings her a slice of cake and she gets extremely irritated with him and angrily scolds at him because she has already brushed her teeth, and would have to brush them again. The next morning at breakfast, Connie continues to snap at Bobby and goes to the bathroom and stays in there for a while. Peggy, not wanting to be late to school because "there are no substitute teachers for substitute teachers that are late" then leaves and tells Hank to take Connie to school late.
Connie emerges from the bathroom and asks for Peggy. When he tells Connie she has already left, she stutters while trying to tell him something and then hands him a notepad. Hank is stunned after Connie gives him a note that says "Mr. Hill, I've gotten my first period". Hank panics and refers to the notes that Kahn left about Connie, to no avail, and Connies begins to cry. Hank is unable to get in touch with Connie's parents or Peggy but does contact his mother but hangs up the phone when he hears her voice. Hank ends up taking Connie to a hospital, where they have taken care of Connie for the meantime and simply tell him he needs to get the proper products from any pharmacy. Hank and Connie go to the Mega Lo Mart and he sends her to the feminine products aisle, but she is overwhelmed with the situation and begins to cry. They go back to the house and Connie and Hank are calm, before Connie asks "now how do I change one of these things?" Hank looks up in horror and then Peggy is then shown being escorted by police off of school grounds (after Hank calls 911 presumably) and she races home, almost destroying Dale's new trash can in the process.
Peggy gets in touch with Mihn, who then informs Kahn of the situation during his speech and he screams and runs off the stage out of the convention center with Mihn running right behind him. Peggy takes Bobby out to eat at the local Whataburger and attempts to explain Connie's situation to him, which afterwards he still doesn't completely understand. After Connie doesn't talk much with Bobby and refuses to do any activities with him he gets angry and storms off.
After Kahn and Mihn come home, Connie runs into her mothers arms. In the alley, Dale eagerly awaits the first trash pick-up of his new trash can, but the mechanism on the trash truck accidentally takes the trash can too and takes off, with Boomhauer chasing it and trying to get it to stop unsuccessfully. At the Souphanousinphone home, Connie is watching sad dolphin stories on TV, crying. Mihn explains how the effects of P.M.S. and how she must now begin to act like an adult because she is becoming a women. Bobby is worried that Connie is going to break-up with him and asks Hank for advice, who explains to him about how her actions are normal. Hank goes to the to Souphanousinphone's to return items of Connie that she left at the Hill's, including the notes on Connie, with newly added information about aisle 8A that Hank wrote for him. Connie apologizes to Bobby and they make-up.
- While choosing pajamas to attempt to impress Connie, he throws his Thomas the Train themed pajamas to the side, and pulls out Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles pajamas and exclaims "Turtles? These may work!"
- In the season 5 episode "I Don't Wanna Wait For Our Lives To Be Over", Joesph hits puberty and Bobby brings up when Connie hit puberty.
- KAHN (to Connie before they leave her at the Hill residence): This is anti-bacterial hand gel. Leave a thin protective film on you at all times.
- CONNIE: You know I've always wondered. Propane is called liquid petroleum, but isn't it a gas, Mr. Hill?
- HANK: Please, Connie, call me Hank.
- BOBBY: (to Hank at dinner table): May I take those plates out of your way sir? And can I tempt you with some Toaster Strudels? Or are we watching our figures?
- HANK: Just take the plates Bobby.
- BOBBY: Very good sir.
- KAHN: Oh, man, this is the best speech ever written! JFK got nothing on me. "Profiles in Jealousy." Ha ha!
- MINH: You need to relax, Kahn. Come, we throw frisbee. Where it land, that's where we make crazy love.
- KAHN: Oh, yeah! I am bad boy of systems analysis.
- NURSE: Here's a list of products for Connie that you can pick up at any pharmacy.
- HANK: Couldn't you just give her the stuff? You are a hospital.
- NURSE: No, you have to go and buy them.
- HANK: I mean, let's say you got stitches. You might sent me home with a box of Band-Aids if I asked for them, right?
- NURSE: Band-Aids aren't going to work in this situation. Please, don't try Band-Aids.
- HANK: Aisle 8A. Boy, we sure are a long way from automotive.
- PEGGY: Ugh, poor Connie.
- HANK: Poor Connie? Poor me. I had to learn about megalabsorbancy.
- PEGGY: Connie started her period.
- BOBBY: What's that now?
- PEGGY: She has taken her first steps to becoming a woman.
- BOBBY: She can't be a woman! I'm still a kid. Look at me! I even got the kids' meal. I love this toy.
- PEGGY: Oh, Bobby, honey, you will catch up eventually. This year, next year, it does not matter when. Because you will always be Mommy's little man.
- CONNIE: Mom, I was really mean to Bobby and I don't know why.
- MINH: He annoying little boy.
- CONNIE: Mom...!
- MINH: Kahn Jr., you have PMS. It's hard, but very easy to understand. You just *yell and yell, or you just cry and cry.
- CONNIE: But it feels like I'm doing both of those at the same time.
- MINH: Connie, you feel things more now. Makes sad movies truly excellent. You see Titanic on the right day, it blow you away.
- HANK: Bobby, every woman has a period... of time every month.
- BOBBY: Even Mom?
- HANK: Bobby, if we're gonna get through this, you cannot ask me questions like that.
- BOBBY: My bad.
- HANK: Now, every month, a woman has this time when she gets very angry at everything. And usually, men are the everything. It's like a tire fire. Trying to put it out just makes it worse. You just gotta let it burn. Grab a beer, and let it burn.
- KAHN: Hank Hill. You ruin my life. What can I do for you?
- BOBBY: So now you're a woman.
- CONNIE: Technically, I think I'm only a woman four days a month.
- BOBBY: Four days? Well, that's for most people. But you're super-organized. I bet you can get through it in two days.
- CONNIE: I don't think that's how it works.
- BOBBY: You know, if I was becoming a man, I wouldn't dump you.
- CONNIE: I don't want to dump you, Bobby. I still want to be your girlfriend. But for those four days when I'm a woman, I don't want to be anywhere near you.
- BOBBY: Deal! I'll see you in two days.